Paddy asks Murphy, ‘Why do scuba divers fall off their boats backwards?” Murphy replies, “If they fell forwards they’d still be on the fucking boat!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Shop assistant: How about this one? Psychic: That shirt is too small. Shop assistant: You didn’t even try it on? Psychic: I’m a medium. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
One day there was a blind man walking down the street and he smelled oranges, so he bought some fruit. He smelled some pastries, so he bought some donuts. Then he walked past a fish market, took a hard sniff, and said, “Hello ladies!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You … Read more
A policeman is on scene at a terrible accident – body parts everywhere. He is making his notes of where the pieces are and comes across a head. He writes in his notebook: “Head on bullevard” and scratches out his spelling error. “Head on bouelevard” Nope, doesn’t look right – scratch scratch. “Head on boolevard… … Read more
A man brought some prescription tablets and started cutting off the edges. This is because he wanted to avoid the side effects. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Two old ladies are at the movies. “Psst, “says one old lady. “I think the guy next to me is beating off. “ “What makes you say that?” “He’s using my hand. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Two old friends met by chance on the street. After chatting for some time, one said to the other, “I’m terribly sorry, but I’ve forgotten your name. You’ll need to tell me. “ The other stared at him thoughtfully for a long time, then replied, “How soon do you need to know? This joke is … Read more
A man enters a store and says: “5 liters of wine, please. “ “Did you bring a container for this? “ “You’re speaking to it. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
One afternoon, Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel’s ear and she says, “Mable, did you know you’ve got a suppository in your left ear?” Mable answered, “I have a suppository in my EAR?” She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, “Ethel, I’m awfully glad you saw this thing. Now I think … Read more