Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman’s head. “Yech!” says the woman. “Get some toilet paper. “ “What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A young man has spent five years traveling throughout the world making a documentary on native dances. He is nearing the end of his project and winds up in Australia in Alice Springs. He begins to talk to an Aborigine, who asks the researcher if he ever saw the “Butcher Dance. “ “Butcher Dance? What’s … Read more
During camouflage training a private disguised as a tree trunk had made a sudden move that was spotted by a visiting general. “You simpleton!” the officer barked. “Don’t you know that by jumping and yelling the way you did, you could have endangered the lives of the entire company?” “Yes sir, “the soldier answered apologetically. … Read more
A psychiatrist had no patients in his office and he was bored. Suddenly , the door opened slowly and a man crept into the room on four legs. His mouth was full with pieces of colored plastic. He was holding strange objects in his hands. He was dragging cables along behind himself. The doctor was … Read more
An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, “How odd. Scottish sheep are black. “ “No, no, no!” says the physicist. “Only some Scottish sheep are black. “ The mathematician rolls his eyes … Read more
A guy walks into a bar with an alligator. It’s about 10 feet long. The bartender flips out and says, “Hey buddy, you gotta get that son of a bitch outta here. It’s going to bite one of my customers and I’m going to get sued. “ The guy says, “No no no, it’s a … Read more
A guy was walking along the street when he saw a crowd of people running towards him. He stopped one of the runners and asked, “What’s happening?” The runner replied breathlessly, “A lion has escaped from the zoo. “ “Oh my, which way is it heading?” “Well you don’t think we are chasing it, do … Read more
A man sat at a local bar and said, “This is a special day, I’m celebrating. “ “What a coincidence, “said the woman next to him. “I’m celebrating, too, “she replied, clinking glasses with him. “What are you celebrating?” “I’m a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they’re finally … Read more
This guy from up north just up and one day moved down south to start a farm. He came across this man and asked him where he could get a good donkey to pull a cart and plow. The man said I’ve got just what you need. Only thing is down here we don’t call … Read more
A little girl asks her Mom, “May I take the dog for a walk around the block?” Mom says, “No honey, the dog is in heat. “ “What’s that mean?” asked the child. “Go ask your Father. I think he’s in the garage”. The little girl goes to the garage and says, “Dad, can I … Read more