Standing before the judge during an alimony hearing, the man said, “As God is my judge, I do not owe that madwoman money!” The judge calmly replied, “He isn’t. I am. You do. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered, with his thumb over the meat. “Are you crazy?” yells the customer. “What’s with your hand on my steak?” “Sorry, “answers the waiter, “I don’t want it to fall on the floor again. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can … Read more
Weary of constantly picking clothes up from the floor of her son’s room, a mother finally laid down the law. Each item of clothing she had to pick up would cost her son 25 cents. By the end of the week, he owed her $9. 50. She received the money promptly, along with a 50 … Read more
The son has finally saved enough money to buy his own house. It is just a few houses down the road from where his parents still live. On the day he moves in he invites some friends over, turns on the music and drinks a few beers. As the son was making his toast and … Read more
A guide was showing Niagara-Falls to a man from Texas and said “I’ll bet you don’t have anything like this in Texas. “ The Texan said: “Nope, but in Texas we have plumbers who can fix it. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Teddy came thundering down the stairs, much to his father’s annoyance. “Teddy, “he called, “how many more times do I have to tell you to come downstairs quietly? Now, go back upstairs and come down like a civilized human being. “ There was a silence, and Teddy reappeared in the front room. “That’s better, “said … Read more
A white-haired old man walked into a jewelry store on a Friday, with a beautiful young lady at his side. “I’m looking for a special ring for my girlfriend, “he said. Our jeweler looked through our stock and took out an outstanding ring priced at $5,000. “I don’t think you understand-I want something very unique, … Read more
A father was driving nails while constructing a play house for his children. The youngest boy asked if he could hammer a nail. The father granted his request and showed him how to do it. The boy did as his father had explained and lightly tapped to set the nail before hammering it in but … Read more
A pickpocket was up in court for a series of petty crimes. The judge said “Mr. Banks you are hereby fined $100. “ The lawyer stood up and said “Thanks, my lord, however my client only has $75 on him at this time, but perhaps you could allow him a few minutes in the crowd… … Read more
One night, Murphy was walking home when, all of a sudden, a thief jumped on him. Murphy and the thief began to wrestle. They rolled about on the ground and Murphy put up a tremendous fight. However, the thief managed to get the better of him and pinned him to the ground. The thief then … Read more