An elderly couple went to breakfast at a restaurant where the Senior Special was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $1. 99. “Sounds good, “the woman said. “But I don’t want the eggs. “ “Then I’ll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine cents because you’re ordering a la carte, “the waitress … Read more
A businessman was explaining to his son, who was a teenager, about the different departments in his own company. “You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, “I am very rich. Marry me!” That is Direct Marketing. You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see … Read more
A magician was employed by a Shipping Line to entertain the passengers during cruises. The captain owned a parrot which always insisted on being part of the acts put on by the magician. He would perch on the edge of the stage and screech, “He does it with a mirror” or “He’s got it up … Read more
A guy walked into a bar and said “Beers for everyone, even you, Bartender. “ But when it was time to pay, the guy didn’t have the money, so the bartender beat him up. The next day the guy did the same thing, ordered a beer for everyone, even the bartender, and the bartender beat … Read more
A big corporation recently hired several cannibals in the interest of cultural diversity. “You are all part of our team now, “said the HR rep during the welcoming briefing. “You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don’t eat any of the other employees. … Read more
An American enters a Swiss bank with a giant, heavy sack in each of his hands. He goes to the teller, brings his face close to the glass and whispers, “I have two million dollars with me. I urgently need to open a secret Swiss bank account!” The Swiss bank teller replies in a normal … Read more
Erica is walking out of a movie theater at the same time as a man with a parrot on his shoulder. Erica turns to the man and says, “Your parrot actually seemed to understand the movie. It looked around during the boring parts, it paid close attention to the dramatic parts, it even squawked during … Read more
A lady walks into a bar and sees a really cute guy sitting at the counter. She goes over and asks him what he is drinking. “Magic Beer”, he says. She thinks he’s a little crazy, so she walks around the bar, but after that there is no one else worth talking to,goes back to … Read more
During an interview, the young lady interviewing for the position was surprised to hear the HR manager say he was looking for someone “to do the work of six men. “ The lady replied: “That’s a shame. I was looking for a full time job. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of … Read more