Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Judge Reaches
April 5, 2026
Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faces the opposing lawyers. ‘Both of you have given me a bribe,’ he says. ‘You, James, gave me £15,000. And you, Ronald, gave me £10,000.’ The judge reaches into his pocket, pulls out a cheque, and hands it to Tom. ‘I’m returning £5,000, and we’ll now decide
Wings Fall Off
April 5, 2026
Two guys die in a car accident and an angel descends from heaven. “I am to give you your wings so you can fly to heaven. But if you think one dirty thought or act out one dirty act your wings will fall off. “ So they fly to heaven without any trouble but when
Sirens Jump
April 5, 2026
Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first one said, “I hear sirens. Jump!” The second one said, “But we’re on the 13th floor!” The first one screamed back, “This is no time to be superstitious. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Pretty Girls
April 5, 2026
A guy was meeting a friend in a bar, and as he walked in he noticed two pretty girls looking at him. He heard one girl say to the other, “Nine. “ Feeling pleased with himself, he swaggered over to his buddy at the bar and told him that the girl in the corner had
Millionaire Crafty Devil
April 5, 2026
A 60-year-old millionaire has just married a 20-year-old model. “You crafty old devil, “says his friend. ‘How did you manage to get a lovely young wife like that?’ “Easy, “replies the millionaire. “I told her I was 92. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Afraid I’ll Need
April 5, 2026
Late one Friday night a policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening. “Aye, so I have’tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a