Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Place Between
April 5, 2026
The following conversation took place between a husband and wife: Wife: “How many women have you slept with?” Husband: “Only you darling, I was awake with the others. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Contest Arises Between
April 5, 2026
Two law partners hire a new cute, young secretary and a contest arises between them as to who can bed her first, even though they’re both already married. Eventually one of them scores with her and his partner is quite eager to hear how things went. “So what did you think?” he asks. “Ahh, “replies
Asshole Attorneys
April 5, 2026
A man came storming out of the courthouse ranting and raving; obviously really angry. He stomped across the street and into the bar and flounced down on a stool muttering, “Asshole attorneys”. The man next to him recoiled in outrage saying “I want you to know I highly resent that remark”. “Why, are you an
Horse Ain’t
April 5, 2026
A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above
Prohibited Uh-Oh
April 5, 2026
A man in a hurry taking his ten-year-old son to school made a turn at a red light where it was prohibited. “Uh-oh, I think I just made an illegal turn!” the man said. “It’s okay, Dad, “the boy said, “The police car right behind us did the same thing. “ This joke is included
Million I’ll
April 5, 2026
NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go and couldn’t return to Earth. The first applicant, an engineer, was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going. “A million dollars, “he answered, “because I want to donate it to my favorite Institute of Technology” The next applicant, a
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a