Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Johnny Taps
April 5, 2026
A traveling salesman rings this doorbell. 10 year old little Johnny opens, holding a beer and smoking a fat cigar. The salesman says, “Little boy is your mother home?” Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, “What do you think?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can
Laundry Detergent
April 5, 2026
A young boy, about eight years old, was at the grocery store picking out a pretty good size box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do. “Oh, no laundry, “the boy said. “I’m going to wash my dog.
Teacher Held
April 5, 2026
On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist’s son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, “I bet I know what it is – it’s some flowers!” “That’s right!” shouted the little boy. Then the candy store owner’s daughter handed the
Birds Mixed
April 5, 2026
The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees. She explained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine months later, the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Johnny ,at the back of the class, put his hand up and asked the
Brother Responded Johnny
April 5, 2026
During the soccer match little Johnny sits in the front row. His friend asks:”How did you get tickets?” “From my brother, “responded Johnny. “And where is your brother?” “At home. Looking for his ticket. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Eat Light Bulbs
April 5, 2026
Little Johnny and his two friends are sitting on the front porch one day. The first one says, “My Daddy is so cool he can eat four Burgers at one meal. “ The second one says, “That’s nothing. My Daddy can eat six. “ Little Johnny starts laughing and says, “My Daddy can eat light
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a