Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
Browse Categories
View All Categories-
(181)
-
(1)
-
(69)
-
(356)
-
(748)
-
(1)
-
(95)
-
(836)
-
(1)
-
(15)
Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Swallowed Condom Emergency
April 5, 2026
A man calls 911 emergency: “Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom!” After five minutes, the same man calls back: “It is ok, I found another one. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Green Glitter
April 5, 2026
A king wants his daughter to have a husband so he puts up a flier. The first guy comes and the king puts green glitter on his daughter’s private part. The next morning the king checks the guy’s private part and there’s green glitter all over it. More and more guys come along and the
Chief Yells Death
April 5, 2026
Two men were shipwrecked on an island. They decided to venture inland to see if they could find someone. The men came across a village in the middle of a jungle, immediately they were surrounded by a tribe of islanders. The chief walks to the men and says, “What do you choose, Death or Boogaloo?”
Fancy Dress Party
April 5, 2026
A nun gets on a bus that’s empty except for the driver. She says “I’m going to die soon but I want to have sex before I die. Problem is I must remain a virgin so it has to be in the ass. I can’t commit adultery, so the man must be single. Can you
Poor Fool’s
April 5, 2026
“Honey, “said this husband to his wife, “I invited a friend home for supper. “ “What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven’t been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don’t feel like cooking a fancy meal!” “I know all that. “ “Then why did you invite a friend for
Gentlemen Budget Cuts
April 5, 2026
Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive’s wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, “… and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair. “ This
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a