Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
News Well
April 5, 2026
A guy’’s wife goes missing while diving off the Australian coast. He reports the event, searches fruitlessly and spends a terrible night wondering what could have happened to her. Next morning there’s a knock at the door and he is confronted by a couple of policemen, the old sergeant and a younger constable. The sergeant
Shaved Myself Down
April 5, 2026
A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says, “Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?” The boyfriend says, “Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Owner Answered
April 5, 2026
A duck walked into a pet store and asked the owner if he sold “duck-food” here. The owner said; “No, I don’t sell duck food here”. The next day the duck went back to the same pet store, and asked the owner again if he sold “duck-food” here. The owner became very angry and said;
Flight Attendant – Plane Its
April 5, 2026
A plane is on its way to Miami when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section. The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that’s the type of ticket she paid
Chased Organ Broke
April 5, 2026
A naked man broke into a church. The police chased him around and finally caught him by the organ. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Executioner Shouts Ready
April 5, 2026
Three women are about to be executed for crimes. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead, and one’s a blonde. Two guards bring the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready … Aim … “ Suddenly the brunette yells, “earthquake! !” Everyone is
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a