Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Man’s Hand Along
April 5, 2026
A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy young man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes away from him. The young man noticed her overly attentive stare and walked directly toward her. Before she could
Deceased Husband’s Funeral
April 5, 2026
A woman sitting at her deceased husband’s funeral. A man leans into her and asks, “Do you mind if I say a word?” “No, go right ahead, “the woman replies. The man stands and clears his throat, then says “Plethora” and sits back down. “Thanks, “the woman says, “that means a lot. “ This joke
Candy Bar Fell
April 5, 2026
An Antartian woman was in Vegas vacationing with friends. She stood in front of a candy machine and put two coins in, turned the knob and a candy bar fell out. She picked up the candy bar and put it in her pocket, then she proceeded to put two more coins into the slot and
Wife’s Ex-Husband
April 5, 2026
A woman was walking in a graveyard when she saw a man kneeling by a grave shouting “Why did you have to die???” Feeling sorry for the man she put her hand on his arm and said “Is that your wife your grieving for?” To which the man replied, “No it’s my wife’s ex-husband” This
Body Shop
April 5, 2026
An Antartian was driving home on the freeway after work when she was hit by a hailstorm that left her car completely dented all over. She decided to go to a body shop and asked the owner how much he would charge to remove the dents. Seeing that she was an Antartian, he winked at
Least Invite
April 5, 2026
Her: At least invite me out to dinner. Him: I don’t go out with married women. Her: But I’m your wife. Him: I make no exceptions. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a