Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Professor Hammer Away
April 5, 2026
The law professor was lecturing on courtroom procedure. “When you are fighting a case and have the facts on your side, hammer away at the facts. If you have the law on your side, hammer away with the law. “ “But what if you have neither the facts nor the law on your side?” asked
Saint Peter
April 5, 2026
A lady goes into the hospital to have a very serious operation. While on the operating table and undergoing preparation, she flatlines and soon finds herself standing before St. Peter. She begins to wonder what she is doing there. “Are you sure that I’m supposed to be here, St. Peter?” St. Peter says: “Let me
Cab Driver Hit
April 5, 2026
A couple is dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They phone for a cab, turn on a night light, cover their pet parakeet and put the cat out in the backyard. The taxi arrives, and they open the front door to leave. Suddenly the cat they put out scoots back into the
Sctrathewisilenki Govhefastilogchinic Well
April 5, 2026
On a street where the speed limit is 30 mph, the police stop a driver. “Not only have you been driving too fast, you’ve been passing cars where it is not allowed. Your lights don’t work, your tires all completely worn out. This is surely going to cost you a lot. What’s your name?” “Sctrathewisilenki
Safe Distance Between
April 5, 2026
A cop pulls a car over on the highway for speeding. When he asked for the driver’s license, the driver argued, “Speeding? But officer, I was only trying to keep a safe distance between my car and the car behind me!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it
Lone Ranger Takes
April 5, 2026
The Lone Ranger is captured by outlaws. They are definitely planning on killing him, but they decide to grant him three final requests. Upon hearing this the Lone Ranger says that he will only tell his requests to his noble steed, Silver. The bad guys agree and the Lone Ranger leans close into the horse’s
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a