Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Real Lady Killer

Real Lady Killer

April 5, 2026

A young woman gazed up from her hospital bed at the very handsome doctor who was examining her chart. She fluttered her eyelids and said, “They tell me that you are a real lady killer. “ The doctor smiled and shook his head. “No, I make no distinction between the sexes. “ This joke is

Ceo Explained I’ll

Ceo Explained I’ll

April 5, 2026

One CEO always scheduled staff meetings for 4:30 on Friday afternoons. One of the employees finally got up the nerve to ask why, and the CEO explained. “I’ll tell you it’s very simple – it’s the only time of the week when none of you seems to want to argue with me. “ This joke

Hour Lecture

Hour Lecture

April 5, 2026

Fred’s boss said, “Why are all the women in your office crying?” Fred said, “You told me to bang some heads together. “ The boss said, “Talk about taking things too literally!” Fred went away and prepared a two hour lecture on taking things too literally. This joke is included in the Black Book of

Piano Tuner

Piano Tuner

April 5, 2026

The doorbell rang and the lady of the house discovered a workman, complete with tool chest, on the front door. “Lady, “he announced, “I’m the piano tuner. “ The lady exclaimed, “Why, I didn’t send for a piano tuner. “ The man replied, “I know, but your neighbors did. “ This joke is included in

Son-In-Law Buy

Son-In-Law Buy

April 5, 2026

A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. “I welcome you into the family!” said the man. “To show you how much we care for you, I am making you a 50-50 partner in my business. All you have to do is go to the factory everyday and learn the operation. “

Drums Judge Twenty

Drums Judge Twenty

April 5, 2026

Judge: “Haven’t I seen you before?” Man: “Yes, Your Honor. I taught your daughter how to play the drums. “ Judge: “Twenty years!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

Next