Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
True Joyce
April 5, 2026
Stan was tired from fishing all morning , so he went in for a nap . His wife ,Joyce ,took the boat out onto the lake and sat in it reading a book . After about half an hour , the sheriff pulled alongside in his motor-boat ‘“Ma’am “he said , “I am sorry but
Eleanor Roosevelt
April 5, 2026
Wife: “Eleanor Roosevelt said “intelligent people are those with ideas”. Husband: “That sounds like me. I always have many ideas!” Wife: “Honey, I don’t think Mrs. Roosevelt was thinking about ideas that start out with, ‘“Hey guys, just watch this!’ “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it
Wish Harrold
April 5, 2026
Genie: “OK, I’m ready for your third wish. “ Harrold: “Third? What about the first two?” Genie: “Well, this is a little unusual, but after your first wish, you screamed like a madman and said “I wish I’d never made that wish!” So that counted as your second wish, and I erased your memory of
Wasn’t Love
April 5, 2026
Two friends are discussing the possibility of love. “I thought I was in love three times, “one friend says. “How so?” his friend asks. “Five years ago I deeply cared for a woman who wanted nothing to do with me. “ “And that wasn’t love?” his friend asks. “No, “he replies. “That was an obsession.
Bass Boat
April 5, 2026
A man went on a dating website, hoping to find a wife. In his profile description he wrote, “Looking for a woman that is smart, pretty, funny, a good cook, organized at home, and has a bass boat!” He then paused, gave it some more thought, and added, “To be considered, please include a picture
Burned Calories
April 5, 2026
Mike: “I just burned 3000 calories in 20 minutes. “ Lilly: “How?” Mike: “I forgot to take my pizza out of the oven. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a