Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Blond Smirked
April 5, 2026
A blond, a redhead and a brunette were trying out for a new NASA experiment on sending people to different planets. First, they called the brunette in and asked her a question. “If you could go to any planet, what planet would you want to go to and why?” After pondering the question she answered,
Librarian Nodded
April 5, 2026
A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library and with a screaming voice said, “I have a complaint!” “How can I help you?” said the librarian looking up at her. “I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!” Puzzled by her complaint the librarian asked “What was wrong with it?”
Burrrrrrr Gerrrrrrr
April 5, 2026
Two tourists were driving through Rhode Island. As they were approaching Quonochontaug, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town’s name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, where one of the tourists asked the blonde employee. “Before we order, could you please settle an
Responds Well
April 5, 2026
A man and his young son are walking together in a park, and they stumble upon two dogs mating. The son asks, “Daddy, Daddy! What are those dogs doing?” to which the man replies, “Son, those dogs are making puppies. “ Few weeks later, the child walks unannounced into his parents bedroom while his parents
Lad’s Lustful Desire
April 5, 2026
A young couple is out for a romantic Valentine’s Day walk along a country lane. They walk hand in hand and as they stroll, the lad’s lustful desire rises to a peak. He is just about to get frisky when she says, “I hope you don’t mind, but I really do need to take a
Umbrella Keeping Scream
April 5, 2026
“Give it to me! Give it to me!” she yelled. “I’m so wet, give it to me now!” She could scream all she wanted, but he was keeping the umbrella. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Chinese Proverb
April 5, 2026
James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light