Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Rats Well

Rats Well

April 5, 2026

Two Scientists were working late discussing ideas about behavior modification studies. “We’ve started something new at my lab, “said the first scientist. “For some of our more dangerous experiments, we’re now using lawyers”. “Lawyers?” asks the second scientist. “Why aren’t you using rats?” “Well you know how it is, “the first scientist replies. “You can

I’ll Examine

I’ll Examine

April 5, 2026

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a dog. Doctor: Lie down on the couch and I’ll examine you. Patient: I can’t, I’m not allowed on the furniture. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Pigs Eat

Pigs Eat

April 5, 2026

There was once a man from the city who was visiting a small farm, and during this visit he saw a farmer feeding pigs in a most extraordinary manner. The farmer would lift a pig up to a nearby apple tree, and the pig would eat the apples off the tree directly. The farmer would

Shelter’s Pantry Regardless

Shelter’s Pantry Regardless

April 5, 2026

A man walks into a bar and says “I just got back from the battered women’s shelter, and boy are my arms tired. “ Everyone laughed. The man sat at the end of the bar drinking alone. He was proud of the fine craftsmanship of the shelves he put up in the shelter’s pantry, regardless

Bus Conductor – Bus Conductor

Bus Conductor – Bus Conductor

April 5, 2026

A bus conductor asks a drunk for his ticket. He goes through all his pockets but can’t find it. ‘It’s okay,’ says the conductor. ‘I’m sure you paid.’ ‘Never mind that,’ says the drunk. ‘If I can’t find it, how am I supposed to know where I’m going?’ This joke is included in the Black

Normal Person

Normal Person

April 5, 2026

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. “Well, “said the Director, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty

Previous Next

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light