Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Strange Socks

Strange Socks

April 5, 2026

Billy: “What a pair of strange socks you’re wearing, one is green and the other is blue with red spots! !” Drew: “Yes, it’s really strange. I’ve got another pair just like that at home. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Until He’s Older

Until He’s Older

April 5, 2026

A wife to her husband as they watch their young son playing: “He’s such a sensitive child. Let’s wait until he’s older before we tell him you’re an accountant. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Become President

Become President

April 5, 2026

A loving couple was celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary, privately, at home with a couple of bottles of champagne. A bit tipsy and feeling very intimate the husband turns to his wife and asks, “Tell me truthfully, have you ever been unfaithful to me?” “Well, “she replied, “since you asked, to tell you the truth

Dollar Bill

Dollar Bill

April 5, 2026

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you. “ The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you

Bathroom Door

Bathroom Door

April 5, 2026

A young couple were married, and celebrated their first night together, doing what newlyweds do, time and time again, all night long. The morning comes and the groom goes into the bathroom but finds no towel when he emerges from the shower. He asks the bride to please bring one from the bedroom. When she

Tattoo Artist

Tattoo Artist

April 5, 2026

A guy goes into a tattoo parlor and asks for a tattoo of a $100 bill on his penis. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want that. “Three reasons: I like to play with my money, I like to watch my money grow, and a hundred dollars seems to be the

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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