Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Whole Hours
April 5, 2026
Two blond girls are discussing: “Yesterday during the blackout I got stuck in the elevator for three whole hours!” “Tell me about it! I got stuck in the escalators. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Tennis Balls Answered
April 5, 2026
One day while jogging, a man noticed two tennis balls lying by the side of the road. He picked the balls up, put them in his pocket and proceeded on his way. Waiting at the cross street for the light to change, he noticed a beautiful blonde standing next to him and smiling. “What are
Strongest Pills
April 5, 2026
An exhausted looking blonde dragged himself into the doctor’s office. “Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night, and I can’t get a wink of sleep. “ “I have good news for you, “the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications. “Here are some new
Wrecked Car Officer
April 5, 2026
A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived. “My God!” the trooper gasped. “Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma’am?”
Next Red Light
April 5, 2026
A trucker stops at a red light and a blonde catches up to him. She knocks on the window and says, “Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load. “ The trucker just ignores her, the light changes, and he proceeds down the street. At the next light, the blonde
Cop Yelled Pull
April 5, 2026
A police officer saw a car speeding down the highway. He started chasing after the speeder. When he got close he saw it was a blonde woman who was actually knitting while driving. The cop yelled, “Pull over!” The blonde shouted back, “No! It’s a sweater!” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a