Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Wasn’t Misguided
April 5, 2026
The children were all lined up for their first confession when Little Johnny’s turn came. The priest asked him to confess his sins, and the boy promptly replied, “Father, I threw a stone at Jimmy. “ “That was a very misguided thing to do, my son, “said the priest patiently. “It wasn’t misguided at all,
Again Yup Nope
April 5, 2026
Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over 90 mph. “Hey, “asked the brunette at the wheel “Any cops following us?” The blonde turned around and had a long look at the road behind them. “Yeah, looks like it” Are his flashers on?” The blonde turned around again… … “Yup…Nope…Yup…Nope…Yup…Nope…Yup…. “ This joke
Revelation Begins Behold
April 5, 2026
A new pastor was visiting the homes of his parishioners. At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door. Therefore, he took out a business card and wrote ‘Revelation 3:20’ on the back of it and stuck it in the door. When
Ventriloquist They’re
April 5, 2026
A ventriloquist is working in a small rural town and during his show a local stands up and yells, “Hey You! On Stage! You’ve been making smart-aleck remarks about us small-town folk being stupid all night long! We’re not all stupid, ya know!” “Relax” said the ventriloquist, “They’re just jokes!” “I’m not talking to you,
Choice I’d
April 5, 2026
A man who hadn’t attended church in years suddenly began attending faithfully on Sunday mornings instead of going fishing as was his normal habit. The pastor was highly gratified and at the end of service one morning told him, “How wonderful it makes me feel to see you at services with your good wife!” “Well,
Cheerful Giver
April 5, 2026
A mother wanted to teach her daughter a moral lesson. She gave the girl a quarter and a dollar for church. “Put whichever one you want in the collection plate and keep the other for yourself, “she told the girl. Sunday, when they were coming out of the church, the mother asked her daughter which
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a