Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Lucky They’re Small

Lucky They’re Small

April 5, 2026

A man traveling through the country stopped at a small roadside fruit stand and bought some apples. When he mentioned they were awfully small, the farmer replied, “Yup” The man took a bite of one of the apples and exclaimed, “Not very flavorful, either. “ “That’s right, “said the farmer. “Lucky they’re small, ain’t it?”

Real Tough Guys

Real Tough Guys

April 5, 2026

A man was applying for a job as a prison guard. The warden said, “Now these are real tough guys in here. “Can you handle it?” “No problem, “the applicant replied, “If they don’t behave, they’ll go out!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Whole Pile

Whole Pile

April 5, 2026

Two cowboys are riding their horses together on the prairie. They come upon a big pile of manure. The first cowboy goes to the second, “I will bet you a $1000 that I can eat all of this crap. “ The second cowboy agrees, so the first cowboy eats the entire pile and wins $1000.

Sleep Alone

Sleep Alone

April 5, 2026

A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, “Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you. “ “I know, “said the man, “but

Morris Mailed Off

Morris Mailed Off

April 5, 2026

After trying a new shampoo for the first time, Morris mailed off an enthusiastic letter of approval to the manufacturer. Several weeks later he came home from work to find a large carton in the middle of the floor. Inside were free samples of the many products the same company produced: soaps, detergents,toothpaste, and paper

Lake Street

Lake Street

April 5, 2026

A man was walking down the street when he came across a body lying on the sidewalk. He ran to a phone and called 911. The operator asked him where he was and the man replied, “I’m on Sycamore Drive. “ “How do you spell that?” the operator asked. “S-i-c-k…” the man began. “No, s-i-c-a….

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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