Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Genie Rubbed Chocolate

Genie Rubbed Chocolate

April 5, 2026

A man rubbed a bottle and a genie came out, “OK the genie said what’s your wish” The man said “I want all ladies to love me”, and he turned into a bar of chocolate. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Death Etc Honey

Death Etc Honey

April 5, 2026

Barry and Hannah, an old married couple, are sitting on the couch watching TV. On the show they were speaking about how to prepare in case of death etc. “Honey, “says Barry, turning to his wife with a serious expression, “I want you to promise me, that if there ever comes a time that I

Flower Harry Leaned

Flower Harry Leaned

April 5, 2026

Harry and Barbra’s marriage has been on the rocks for a while, so when they hear about a marriage seminar being given in their neighborhood they decide to attend. “One of the most important things in marriage”, said the speaker, “is to get to really know your spouse well. For example, “continued the speaker, “How

Flat Tire

Flat Tire

April 5, 2026

A newly married couple went fishing on their vacation. Afterwards the wife’s mother asked her how it went. “Oh, it was terrible, everything went wrong, we overslept, and then we got a flat tire, and the worst part was that I caught more fish than he did! This joke is included in the Black Book

Psychiatrist’s Office Hello

Psychiatrist’s Office Hello

April 5, 2026

Two Hollywood stars ran into each other at the door of their psychiatrist’s office. “Hello, there, “said one. “Are you coming or going?” “If I knew that, “said the other, “I wouldn’t be here. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Hollywood Hostess

Hollywood Hostess

April 5, 2026

A Hollywood hostess, giving instructions to a new maid just before a party, cautioned: “Now remember, Marie, when you serve my guests, don’t wear any jewelry. “ “I haven’t anything valuable, madam, “answered the maid. “But thanks for the warning just the same. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You

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Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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