Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Fork Ready
April 5, 2026
A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. “I’m sorry, sir, but I am blind and can’t read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer. I’ll smell it and order
Road Crew
April 5, 2026
A man worked for a road crew. One day he woke up ill with a touch of laryngitis, but being a dedicated employee, he went to work. The boss felt rather sorry for the worker and didn’t want him to do any physical labor, as they were repairing a part of the freeway. He says,
Wide-Eyed Screams Stop
April 5, 2026
A mechanic comes home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. He grabs the guy and drags him naked down the stairs to the garage,where he grabs the guy’s cock, puts it in a vise, screws it down real tight and removes the handle of the vise. Then he rummages
Between Constructive Criticism
April 5, 2026
A teacher asks his pupils, “Can anyone tell me the difference between constructive criticism and unnecessary nastiness?” Little Johnny puts his hand up. “One is the process of offering valid and well-reasoned opinions about the work of others, usually involving both positive and negative comments. “ “Very good, Johnny, “says the teacher. “And the other?”
Hired Yay
April 5, 2026
A man goes to a job interview. His resume was fantastic and his qualities were perfect for the company. The interviewers were impressed. “You are a strong candidate, and we would like to hire you. However, there’s a six year gap in your resume. What were you doing during that time?” “I went to Yale”
Fridge Refrigerator Mother’s
April 5, 2026
A man comes home and sees a note on the refrigerator from his wife. She wrote, “This isn’t working. I’m at my mother’s. “ The man opens the fridge, the light turns on, and he says to himself, “What the hell? The fridge is working fine!” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a