Lucky Mine’s
Two husbands were having a conversation, First guy says proudly: “My wife’s an angel!” Second guy: “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Jokes Ltd
Sven Madge
One day Sven walks into the local pub and announces, “Well boys Svens is getting married. “ As you can imagine all of Sven’s friends were very happy for Sven’s good fortune and they asked, “Who’s the lucky girl?” Sven replied, “Well I am marrying Madge. “ Well, this upset all of Sven’s friends because … Read more
Helicopter Rides
An old couple is at a fair and the old man sees a helicopter ride for $50. The old man asks his wife, “I don’t have much time left. Can I ride in one of them helicopters?” His wife responds, “Oh well that’s way too expensive. “ The man running the helicopter rides as a … Read more
Fancy Porches
At a paternity trial, the blonde’s lawyer asked, “On the night of July 16th last, at approximately 11:45 p. m. , in the locale known generally as ‘Lover’s Lane’ did the defendant have sexual relations with you?” “Yes, “whispered the girl, her head bowed. “And did the defendant on that occasion, to the best of … Read more
Corner Degrees Cold
Son: Dad, it’s so cold in here! Father: Go stand in the corner. Son: Why? Father: The corner is 90 degrees. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Flag Pole
A team of engineers were required to measure the height of a flag pole. They only had a measuring tape, and were getting quite frustrated trying to keep the tape along the pole. It kept falling down, etc. A mathematician comes along, finds out their problem, and proceeds to remove the pole from the ground … Read more
Didn’t Marry
A couple goes out to dinner to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. On the way home, she notices a tear in his eye and asks if he’s getting sentimental because they’re celebrating 50 wonderful years together. He replies, “No, I was thinking about the time before we got married. Your father threatened me with a … Read more
Counter Empty-Handed They’ll
Arnold and his wife were cleaning out the attic one day when he came across a ticket from the local shoe repair shop. The date stamped on the ticket showed that it was over eleven years old. They both laughed and tried to remember which of them might have forgotten to pick up a pair … Read more
Mathematician Exclaimed
A mathematician and an engineer agreed to take part in an experiment. They were both placed in a room and at the other end was a beautiful naked woman on a bed. The experimenter said every 30 seconds they would be allowed to travel half the distance between themselves and the woman. The mathematician said … Read more
Answered Even Quicker
A lawyer, an engineer and a mathematician were called in for a test. The engineer went in first and was asked, “What is 2+2?” The engineer thought for a while and finally answered, “4. “ Then the mathematician was called in and was asked the same question. With little thought he replied, “4. 0” Then … Read more