Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
Dotty came into the office all aflutter about her husband, “You won’t believe this, Terry, but George takes a fishing- pole into the bathroom and tosses the hook into the tub. “ “You’ve got to be kidding, “gasped Terry. “don’t you think you should take him to a psychiatrist?” “No time, “replied Dotty with a … Read more
Two mothers met for coffee. “Well Ruthie, how are the kids?” “To tell you the truth, my son has married a real tramp!” says Ruth. “She doesn’t get out of bed until 11. She’s out all day spending his money on Heaven knows what, and when he gets home, exhausted, does she have a nice … Read more
A knight and his men return to their castle after a long hard day of fighting. “How are we faring?” asks the king. “Sire, “replies the knight, “I have been robbing and pillaging on your behalf all day, burning the towns of your enemies in the west. “ “What?!” shrieks the king. “I don’t have … Read more
A father was driving nails while constructing a play house for his children. The youngest boy asked if he could hammer a nail. The father granted his request and showed him how to do it. The boy did as his father had explained and lightly tapped to set the nail before hammering it in but … Read more
Grandma: “Oh, what nice new boots! Where did you get them?” Granddaughter: “At the store. “ Grandma: “Which one?” Granddaughter: “Both of them. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A physicist, a mathematician and a computer scientist discuss what is better: a wife or a girlfriend. The physicist: “A girlfriend. You still have freedom to experiment. “ The mathematician: “A wife. You have security. “ The computer scientist: “Both. When I’m not with my wife, she thinks I’m with my girlfriend. With my girlfriend … Read more
Stanley was given the job of painting the white lines down the middle of a highway. On his first day he painted six miles; the next day three miles; the following day less than a mile. Then the foreman asked Stanley why he kept painting less each day? He replied, “I just can’t do any … Read more
A woman drove a minivan filled with a dozen screaming kids through the mall parking lot, looking for a space. Obviously frazzled, she coasted through a stop sign. “Hey, lady, have you forgotten how to stop?” yelled an irate man. She rolled down her window and yelled back, “What makes you think these are all … Read more
A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, “Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. “I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the … Read more
A lawyer was on his cell phone, calling a locksmith. “I locked my keys in my sports car!” said the nervous lawyer. “No problem, I should be there in about an hour, “replied the locksmith. “Do you think you can make it a little sooner?” pleaded the lawyer. “My top is down and it’s starting … Read more