Two young guys appear in court after being arrested for smoking dope. The judge says, “You seem like nice young men, and I’d like to give you a second chance instead of jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to convince others of the evils of drug use. I’ll see … Read more
The attorney tells the accused, “I have some good news and some bad news. “ “What’s the bad news?” asks the accused. “The bad news is, your blood is all over the crime scene, and the DNA tests prove you did it. “ “What’s the good news?” “Your cholesterol is within limits. “ This joke … Read more
In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of the person in front of him. Surprised, the man in front turned and snarled, “Just what the hell are you doing?!” “Well, “said the guy, “you see, I’m a chiropractor and I could see that you … Read more
A lawyer has just settled down in his new office. So now, he is thinking about what he can do to have clients. After a long time thinking, a man comes into the office. Right away, the lawyer decides to make his new plan take action. So he picks up the phone and says: “Unfortunately, … Read more
A lawyer was asked if he likes to become a Jehovah’s Witness. He declined, as he hadn’t seen the accident, but replied that he would still be interested in taking the case. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A lawyer was filling out a job application when he came to the question, “Have you ever been arrested?” He answered, “No. “ The next question, intended for people who had answered in the affirmative to the last one, was “Why?” The lawyer answered it anyway: “Never got caught. “ This joke is included in … Read more
A barber gave a haircut to a priest one day. The priest tried to pay for the haircut, but the barber refused, saying, “you do God’s work. “ The next morning the barber found a dozen bibles at the door to his shop. A policeman came to the barber for a haircut, and again the … Read more
A lawyer and an accountant were having cocktails in the Caribbean. The lawyer said “I’m here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything. “ “That’s quite a coincidence”, said the accountant, “I’m here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed … Read more
A lawyer trying to get tickets to a Broadway show, finally settled for a couple of seats a year in advance. When the exciting night arrived and he sat down in his seat, a woman in front of the lawyer noticed the empty seat next to him and asked why such a valuable commodity was … Read more
A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in Texas. The banks offered a reward for his capture, dead or alive, but offered a much larger award for the recovery of the stolen funds. An enterprising Texas Ranger decided to track him down. After a … Read more