Little Tim, a 5 year old, called 911 and very softly said: “hello”. Officer Pam asked: “Are your parents there?” Little Tim answered: “Yes, their busy”, the police, the fire department are here and they are busy” Officer Pam said : “So son you’re telling me that the police, fire department, and your parents are … Read more
A group of kindergarten children were on a class outing to their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the ten most wanted men. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. “Yes, “answered the policeman. “Well, … Read more
Betty and Tim die in a car accident on the eve of their wedding. In Heaven, they ask St. Peter if they can still be married. “Well, let me find out if this is possible. Stay here and I will be right back. “ Six months pass and Peter returns. “Yes, we can do this … Read more
An old couple is at a fair and the old man sees a helicopter ride for $50. The old man asks his wife, “I don’t have much time left. Can I ride in one of them helicopters?” His wife responds, “Oh well that’s way too expensive. “ The man running the helicopter rides as a … Read more
A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, “I almost had an affair with another woman. “ The priest said, “What do you mean, almost?” The Irishman said, “Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped. “ The priest said, “Rubbing together is the same as putting it … Read more
The father of a four-year old girl is trying to explain to her what a marriage is. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, he decided to pull out his wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the … Read more
A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court, “said the desk sergeant. “No, no no!” said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying … Read more
A small kid was on the street and was playing. A cop who was crossing around that street, saw him and asked him: “What are you doing there kiddo?” “I’m playing… “ “What are you playing?” “Oh, well… I collect sand, I pour some water in and then I add some poop and I’m making … Read more
Little Johnny brings a can to the policeman and asks:”Can you please open the can?” Policeman knocks at it:”Please open the door, police…” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A policeman on a motorcycle pulls over a car. ‘What’s up?’ says the driver. ‘Your wife fell out the passenger door three miles back,’ says the policeman. ‘Thank goodness for that,’ says the driver. ‘I thought I’d gone deaf.’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.