Mrs Laura, a kindergarten teacher, asked her class “what things we can eat?” “Bread” “Yes” “Hamburger” “Ok” A five years girl answered “Light”, “Omg” shouted the teacher, “how can light be eaten?” “Last night I heard mom whispering to dad ‘turn the light off and put it in my mouth’“ This joke is included in … Read more
An airplane encountered some turbulence, it started juddering and rocking noticeably from side to side. The flight crew wheeled out the drinks cart to keep the passengers calm. The attendant asked a businessman. “Would you like a drink?” “Why not?” he replied unkindly “I’ll have whatever the pilot’s been having. “ This joke is included … Read more
A nervous passenger decided to purchase flight insurance at the ticket counter. She had some time before the flight’s departure, so she stopped in a Chinese restaurant in the concourse. She started to shake as she read her fortune cookie: “Today’s investment will pay big dividends!” This joke is included in the Black Book of … Read more
A French monk wrote a manifesto stating that every woman would agree to sell her body for money. The manifesto was read by the Queen of France and she invited the monk for a chat. “So, you’re stating that every woman would agree to sell herself?” “Yes. “ “Me too?” “Of course. “ “And how … Read more
Owner of an aircraft manufacturing company stopped by the aircraft testing airfield to check on the newest test pilot. He asked the supervisor how the new guy was doing. “Terrible! He has already crashed five planes this week!” Owner replied, “How is this possible? Where did he work before coming here?” Supervisor said, “He designed … Read more
A high school English teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. “Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being there tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family – but that’s it, no other excuses whatsoever!” A smart-ass … Read more
A trucker who has been out on the road for two months stops at a brothel outside Atlanta. He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, “I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!” The Madam is astonished. “But sir, for that kind of money you could have one … Read more
During the ‘rush hour’ at Houston’s Hobby Airport, a flight was delayed due to a mechanical problem. Since they needed the gate for another flight, the aircraft was backed away from the gate while the maintenance crew worked on it. The passengers were then told the new gate number, which was some distance away. Everyone … Read more
A regular customer walks into the bar and says, “Bartender, one round for everyone, on me!” The bartender says, “Well, it seems you’re in a really good mood tonight. “ The man replies, “I sure am! Yesterday I was hired by the city to go around and collect money from the parking meters!” The bartender … Read more
A tough looking group of hairy bikers are riding when they see a girl about to jump off a bridge, so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, “What are you doing?” “I’m going to commit suicide, “she says. While he doesn’t want to appear insensitive, he also … Read more