Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
Browse Categories
View All Categories-
(181)
-
(1)
-
(69)
-
(356)
-
(748)
-
(1)
-
(95)
-
(836)
-
(1)
-
(15)
Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Johnny Sorry Teacher
April 5, 2026
Teacher: “Johnny, write a sentence ending with the word hand. “ Johnny: “My penis in your hand. “ Teacher: “What?” Johnny: “Sorry teacher, I forgot to put a space between pen is. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Speed Bicycle
April 5, 2026
For his birthday, little Johnny asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, “Son, we’d give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $285,000 and your mother just lost her job. There’s no way we can afford it now. “ The next day the father saw little Johnny heading out the front door
Coordination Expresses Himself
April 5, 2026
A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for some free professional advice. “What kind of toy would you suggest giving a little boy on his third birthday?” she asked. “First I’d have to know more about the child, “the psychologist hedged. The woman took a deep breath. “He’s very bright
Let’s Eat
April 5, 2026
Two starving cannibals, a father and son, were out trying to get something to eat. They walked deep into the jungle and waited by a path. Before long, along came a little old man. The son said, “Oh Dad, there’s one. “ “No, “said the father. “There’s not enough meat on that one to even
Word Fascinate
April 5, 2026
A teacher asks her students to give her a sentence with the word “fascinate” in it. A little girl says, “Walt Disney World is fascinating. “ The teacher says, “No, I said, fascinate. “ Another little girl says, “There’s so much fascination when it comes to sea life. “ The teacher again says, “No, the
Game Again
April 5, 2026
Little Johnny comes running into the house and asks, “Mommy, can little girls have babies?” “No, “says his mom, “of course not. “ Little Johnny runs back outside yelling to his friends, “It’s okay, we can play that game again!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a