Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Liver Results
April 5, 2026
Doctor says to his patient: “Your liver results are back. And frankly, they’re very surprising considering that I only allowed you one glass of wine per week. “ The patient shrugs: “Do you really think you are the only doctor I am going to?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You
Heal Hemorrhoids
April 5, 2026
A lovey-dovey couple are sitting on a bench in the park and she says: “My ear hurts me…” He kisses it gently and asks, “Is it better now, my darling?” “It’s all gone, “giggles the girl, “but now I have a pain here, “and she points to her neck. The boy kisses it tenderly and
Seniors’ Singles Bar
April 5, 2026
Two old people flirt at a seniors’ singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, “If I took you out for a full night of winning, dining and dancing, what would you wear?” The old woman replies shyly, “Depends…“ “Depends on what?” he asks. “On my bottom – where else?!”
Truck Driver Answers
April 5, 2026
A truck driver phones his boss, “Hey boss, my mirror is broken. “ The boss says, “Well then Just buy a new one and replace it then. “ The truck driver answers, “I can’t. The truck is laying on it. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it
Scotsman Noticed
April 5, 2026
A Scottish man was at a baseball game. It was the first time he had ever seen the sport so he sat quietly. The first batter approached the plate, took a few swings and then hit a double. Everyone was on their feet screaming “Run, run!” This happened two more times, with a single and
Johnny Grandpa
April 5, 2026
Grandpa and Little Johnny are sitting on a bench in the park. Johnny asked, “Grandpa, are you going to take that new Viagra?” Grandpa, caught off-guard, looks at him and says, “No Johnny, I will not. “ “But Grandpa, why not?” asks little Johnny. Grandpa replies, “Well Johnny, because there is no sense in putting
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a