Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Visits India
April 5, 2026
Man visits India and meets an old man in the town square who is renowned for his elephantine memory. He asks the old man what he had for breakfast on the same day 15 years back. “Eggs, “replies the old man, the man scoffs at this saying everyone has eggs for breakfast and walks away.
Sexual Performance Issues
April 5, 2026
An elderly black man goes to see his doctor for help with his sexual performance issues. The doctor explains that the sex enhancing pills aren’t going to work this time. The man goes back to the doctor a month later for a follow-up. This time he is wearing a new tuxedo, shined shoes, and a
Fig Leaf
April 5, 2026
A elderly lady, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters restaurant. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off. Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. She walked up to the bartender, and
Response Ahmed
April 5, 2026
One day, Ahmed’s wife called him a pedophile. In response, Ahmed asked his wife, “So, how does a 9-year-old know such a big word like that?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Dog Well
April 5, 2026
Guy goes to his psychiatrist and says “I’m in love with my dog. “ “Well that is not so unusual, millions of people love their dogs. “ “But doctor, you don’t understand. I’m physically attracted to my dog. I’m in love with my dog. “ “Well, is your dog male or female?” “Female, of course,
Forty Pounds
April 5, 2026
A recent widow was crying to a grief counselor. “We were married twenty-five years before he died, “she said, dabbing away a tear. “Never had an argument in all those years. “ “Amazing, “said the counselor. “How did you do it?” “I outweighed him by forty pounds and he was a coward. “ This joke
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a