Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Lawn Mower
April 5, 2026
A guy had the courage,but not the skills to tackle home-repair projects. His garage was littered with the pieces of a lawn mower he once tried to fix. One day his wife found him in the living room, attacking the vacuum cleaner with a screwdriver. “I can’t get this thing to cooperate!” he exclaimed. His
Cats Polite Bury
April 5, 2026
Wife to husband: “Did you like supper?” Trying to be polite, the husband says, “Yes. “ The wife says, “I was just wondering, because when I gave some to the cats they tried to bury it. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Thy Commandments I’ve
April 5, 2026
Two men were adrift in an open boat, and it looked bad for them. Finally one of them, frightened, began to pray. “O Lord, “he prayed, “I’ve broken most of thy commandments. I’ve been a hard drinker, but if my life is spared now I’ll promise never again… “ “Wait a minute, Jack, “said his
Seem Happy
April 5, 2026
A foreign correspondent did a feature story in a country in the Middle East. She noted women walked five paces behind their husbands. Years later she returned to the same country in the Middle East and observed that women still walked behind their husbands. Despite the overthrow of the old regime, the women now seem
Kitchen Sweetheart Please
April 5, 2026
Two friends are in the living room. The wife of one of them is in the kitchen. “Sweetheart, please, can you hand us the bottle of whisky?” he says. And then, again, “Sweetheart, and two glasses please?” The other man stares at him and says, “My gosh, how long have you been married?” “Thirty years.
Taxi Driver – Goes Business
April 5, 2026
A man goes on a business trip to Manchester during the course of which he has to make a long journey by taxi. During the journey, the driver decides to break the monotony and says to the man, “Do you like riddles?” “Oh yes, “says the man, “I think so. “ “OK, “says the taxi
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a