Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Cellphone Spoke
April 5, 2026
A politician visited a remote little rural village and asked the inhabitants what the government could do for them. “We have two big needs, “said the village headman. “First, we have a hospital but no doctor. “ The politician whipped out his cellphone, spoke for a while and then said, “I have sorted it out.
Exact Words
April 5, 2026
An old woman goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse she has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, “Perhaps, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you. “ The old woman says without
Property Line Isn’t
April 5, 2026
Phil’s neighbor just got arrested for growing marijuana. Phil then realized that his property line isn’t where he thought it was. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Gnat’s Whisker
April 5, 2026
The train was about to pull out of the station. A young man ran towards it and managed to throw his bag in and climb aboard just in time. A fellow passenger looked at him and said, “Young man, you should be in better shape! At your age, I could catch the train by a
Car Keys
April 5, 2026
A man had been in a meeting that lasted all afternoon and as he walked out, he was tired and just wanted to go home. He reached into his coat pocket and realized his car keys were missing. He looked around but could not find his keys. He went outside to look in the car
Pearl Necklace
April 5, 2026
Wife: “Last night I had a dream that you bought me a pearl necklace. “ Husband: “Wow, that’s great! Tonight when you go to sleep, you can put it on. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a