Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Church Rummage Sale

Church Rummage Sale

April 5, 2026

Grumpy Old Man to his wife: “Why didn’t any of the books I donated sell at the church rummage sale?” His wife: “I’m thinking it may have gone better if you hadn’t torn out the pages you didn’t like. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from

Doctor’s Receptionist

Doctor’s Receptionist

April 5, 2026

Mike told the doctor’s receptionist he needed an appointment. “How about 10 tomorrow?” she asked. “I don’t need that many, “he replied. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Serial Killer John

Serial Killer John

April 5, 2026

John picked up a hitchhiker the other night and hitchhiker asked him, “How did you know I was not a serial killer?” John replied, “The chances of two serial killers in the same car are astronomical. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Nurse Love Conceited

Nurse Love Conceited

April 5, 2026

The conceited young man had been in the hospital for some time and had been extremely well looked after by the pretty young nurse. “Nurse, “said the patient, one morning. “I’m in love with you. I don’t want to get well. “ “Don’t worry, “replied the nurse cheerfully, “you won’t. The doctor’s in love with

Act Together

Act Together

April 5, 2026

A police officer stops a young woman for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!” This joke is

Advised Paul

Advised Paul

April 5, 2026

The doctor has advised Paul to stop drinking. Paul realized this is going to be a massive change for him. He’s been visiting that doctor for 15 years. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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