Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
I’ve Drunk
April 5, 2026
A woman was sleeping in her bed when her husband crashed through the front door at 3 am and woke her up. He staggered and tried to get up the stairs, “What are you doing?” she shouted. The husband replied “I’m trying to get a gallon of beer up the stairs” “Leave it down there”
Act Leaving Everything
April 5, 2026
Wife: “I’m leaving you. “ Husband: “Is it because I act like I know everything?” Wife: “Yes. “ Husband: “I knew it. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Dog’s Excellent Karate
April 5, 2026
A young couple lived in a town filled with crime. After three neighbors had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog. Visiting the pet store, the young wife asked for a good guard dog. “Sorry, we’re all sold out, “the clerk replied. “All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But
Reckon You’ve
April 5, 2026
“Well, I reckon you’ve been a pretty good horse, “said the farmer. “You work hard and I ain’t had to call the vet on you much. I only wish you pulled the plow a little faster. “ “NO!” said the horse, “I said ‘feedbag’ not ‘feedback’. “ This joke is included in the Black Book
Venomous Lip Snakes
April 5, 2026
Two snakes are talking. One of them turns to the other and asks, “Are we venomous?” The other replies, “Yes,why?… “ “I just bit my lip. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a