Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Jones Odds
April 5, 2026
Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They put up a sign reading: “Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology. “ The town council was not too happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to: “Hysterias and Posteriors. “ This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy
Specific Pilot Simba
April 5, 2026
Control tower: “What are your coordinates?” Pilot: “I’m by a cloud that looks like a lion. “ Control tower: “Can you be more specific?” Pilot: “Simba” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Phone Down
April 5, 2026
A lawyer has just settled down in his new office. So now, he is thinking about what he can do to have clients. After a long time thinking, a man comes into the office. Right away, the lawyer decides to make his new plan take action. So he picks up the phone and says: “Unfortunately,
Passengers Aren’t
April 5, 2026
One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated waiting for the pilot to show up so they can get underway. The pilot and copilot finally appear in the rear of the plane and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind; the
Rectal Thermometer
April 5, 2026
Patient: “What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?” Doctor: “The taste. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Twenty Bucks Please
April 5, 2026
A man went to visit his doctor. “Doc, my arm hurts bad. Can you check it out please?” the man pleads. The doctor rolls up the man’s sleeve and suddenly hears the arm talk. “Hello, Doctor, says the arm. “Could you lend me twenty bucks please? I’m desperate!” “Aha!” says the doctor, “I see the
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a