Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Near Future

Near Future

April 5, 2026

A lady went to see a tarot reader woman who’ll predict her future: “Lady, I’m sorry to inform you that your husband will die in the near future. “ “Don’t tell me things that I already know, tell me if there would be an investigation!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes.

Well Yes

Well Yes

April 5, 2026

A woman was paying for some items in a supermarket – a pint of milk, a packet of bacon, a small bag of rice and a few vegetables. The man at the checkout said, “I bet you’re single, aren’t you?” “Well yes, I am, “the woman replied. “How did you know?” “Because you’re very ugly,

Soap Nor Towel

Soap Nor Towel

April 5, 2026

A woman is approaching a small bar. She calls the barkeeper and when he is standing in front of her she asks him in a very seductive way to come nearer. Then she bends over the desk and starts to caress his beard. “Are you the boss of this bar?” she asks and touches his

Hole Behind

Hole Behind

April 5, 2026

A guy was playing golf one day and he got lost. He saw a lady up ahead of him, went to her and asked her “Can you please help me? I don’t know what hole I’m on. “ She told him “You are one hole behind me. I’m on 7; you’re on 6. “ He

Clit Pickle Sour

Clit Pickle Sour

April 5, 2026

Two men work in a mortuary. One says to another, “You should see that woman they brought in today. She’d been in the water for a week. Her clit was like a pickle. “ “Ew!” says the other fellow. “It was green?” “No, it was sour!” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Edna I’ve

Edna I’ve

April 5, 2026

Jim and Edna are both mental patients. One day Jim jumps into the swimming pool but doesn’t come up for air. Quick as a flash, Edna sees her friend in trouble, so dives in and pulls him out. Later, the hospital director calls Edna into his office and says “Edna, I’ve got some good news

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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