Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

These Jeans

These Jeans

April 5, 2026

Harry’s wife says, “Harry, do these jeans make my ass look like the side of the house?” He says, “No, our house isn’t blue. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Mathematician Exclaimed

Mathematician Exclaimed

April 5, 2026

A mathematician and an engineer agreed to take part in an experiment. They were both placed in a room and at the other end was a beautiful naked woman on a bed. The experimenter said every 30 seconds they would be allowed to travel half the distance between themselves and the woman. The mathematician said

Answered Even Quicker

Answered Even Quicker

April 5, 2026

A lawyer, an engineer and a mathematician were called in for a test. The engineer went in first and was asked, “What is 2+2?” The engineer thought for a while and finally answered, “4. “ Then the mathematician was called in and was asked the same question. With little thought he replied, “4. 0” Then

Willy Cookies Billy

Willy Cookies Billy

April 5, 2026

The teacher asked Willy, “If you have seven cookies and Billy asks you for three, how many cookies have been left with you?” Willy immediately answered, “Seven! This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Country Inn

Country Inn

April 5, 2026

For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he’d finally managed an affair with the innkeeper’s daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant

Per Pill Price

Per Pill Price

April 5, 2026

A man and his wife went to the pharmacy to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price his wife was astonished – but then realized “it’s only going to cost us $30 per year. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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