Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Eye Examination

Eye Examination

April 5, 2026

A young blonde visiting her new doctor for the first time. She found herself alone in a small waiting room and she began undressing nervously, preparing herself for the upcoming examination. Just as she draped the last of her garments over the back of a chair, a light rap sounded on the door and a

Fire Department

Fire Department

April 5, 2026

A blonde comes home from a day of shopping and discovers that her house is on fire, so she calls the fire department on her cell phone. “Please state the nature of your emergency, “says the operator. “Help! My house is on fire!” the blonde replies. “Okay, where do you live?” “In a house you

Wheel Dashboard

Wheel Dashboard

April 5, 2026

A blonde gets in her car and notices her steering wheel, dashboard, and windshield is missing. She calls the police and reports a theft. When the police officer comes, he looks at the blonde who is crying and says, “Ma’am… you’re sitting in the backseat… “ This joke is included in the Black Book of

Car Phone Rang

Car Phone Rang

April 5, 2026

A blonde was driving down the motorway when her car phone rang. It was her husband, urgently warning her, “Honey, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on the M25. Please be careful!” “It’s not just one car!” said the blonde. “There’s freaking thousands of them!” This joke

Fish Ice

Fish Ice

April 5, 2026

There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes to see who could catch the most fish ice fishing. Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win… they kept pulling out fish after fish. Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of

Cheeseburger Chicken Sandwich

Cheeseburger Chicken Sandwich

April 5, 2026

A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar that reads: Cheeseburger: $1. 50 Chicken Sandwich: $2. 50 Hand Job: $10. 00 He walks up to the bar and beckons one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks. “Can I help you?” she asks. “I was wondering, “whispers the

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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