Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Thirty-Three Pounds

Thirty-Three Pounds

April 5, 2026

One fisherman to another, “You should’ve seen what happened yesterday at the lake. “ “What happened?” “I caught a twenty-three pound salmon!” “Were there any witnesses?” “Yes, of course! If there wasn’t, it would’ve been thirty-three pounds. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Insane Asylum

Insane Asylum

April 5, 2026

An important official who was visiting an insane asylum made a telephone call but had difficulty getting his number. Finally, in exasperation, he shouted to the operator, “Look here, miss, do you know who I am?” “No, “she replied calmly, “but I know where you are. “ This joke is included in the Black Book

Game Charlie

Game Charlie

April 5, 2026

Charlie took his girl friend to her first football game. They had really good seats, right above their team’s bench. At the end of the game, Charlie asked her if she liked it. “Yeah, it was great, “she said. “I mean, with all the tight pants and stuff. I just don’t get why all the

Show Business

Show Business

April 5, 2026

A duck walks into a job center and says to the man behind the desk “Excuse me; I’m looking for a job. Can you help?” The man can’t believe it and replies “Hold on minute sir, I’ll make some enquiries for you’… The man then phones up a showbiz agency and explains that there’s this

Manhole Cover

Manhole Cover

April 5, 2026

At a court date the judge asked, “What makes you think the prisoner was drunk?” “Well, your honor, “replied the arresting officer, “I saw him lift up the manhole cover and walk away with it, and when I asked him what it was for he said, ‘I want to listen to it on my record

Warm Baker

Warm Baker

April 5, 2026

Customer: This loaf is lovely and warm! Baker: So it should be ma’am. The cat’s been sitting on it all morning! This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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