Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Maneuver Couldn’t Contain
April 5, 2026
A young man was trying to park his car between two others. He put it in reverse, and bang – right into the car behind him. He then went forward and bang- right into the car in front. A young woman watching the maneuver couldn’t contain herself. “Do you always park by ear?” she asked.
Employee Thanks
April 5, 2026
The boss called one of his employees into the office. “Steve, “he said, “you’ve been with the company for a year. You started off as an office clerk, one week later you were promoted to a sales position, and one month after that you were promoted to district manager of the sales department. Just four
Local Sign Shop
April 5, 2026
A boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect. Later that morning he went to a local sign shop and bought a small sign that read, “I’m the Boss”. He then taped it to his office door. Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found
Drunk Stumbled
April 5, 2026
A drunk stumbled out the door of the bar. He stood on the corner waiting for the light. His wife calls and asks if he is drunk. The man replies, “Of course not!”. Being suspicious that he is drunk, she says, “Okay then, tell me where you are and I will come and get you.
Windows Frozen Won’t
April 5, 2026
Wife texts husband on a cold winter’s morning:”Windows frozen, won’t open. “ Husband texts back:”Pour some hot water around the edges and then gently tap it with a hammer. “ Wife texts back 5 minutes later:”We now need a new computer. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order
Yes Rob
April 5, 2026
Rob patiently waited at the customer service desk for his turn. He had come back to return a pair of jeans that were too tight. “Is something wrong with them?” the teenage clerk asked him. “Yes, “Rob replied. “They hurt my feelings. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a