Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Three-Week Diet
April 5, 2026
A man says to a friend, “My wife is on a three-week diet. “ “Oh, yeah? How much has she lost so far?” asks his pal. He replies, “Two weeks. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Officer You’d Better
April 5, 2026
Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper. The others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch. A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.
Pharmacy Counter
April 5, 2026
The patient staggered to the pharmacy counter flinching. “Say, would you give me something for my head?” The pharmacist looked up. “Why? What would I do with it?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Father’s Annoyance Teddy
April 5, 2026
Teddy came thundering down the stairs, much to his father’s annoyance. “Teddy, “he called, “how many more times do I have to tell you to come downstairs quietly? Now, go back upstairs and come down like a civilized human being. “ There was a silence, and Teddy reappeared in the front room. “That’s better, “said
Sweeter Disposition
April 5, 2026
One guy to another:”They say brunettes have a sweeter disposition than blondes and redheads. “ “Don’t believe it! My wife has been to all three, and I couldn’t see any difference. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Jeweler I’ll Pay
April 5, 2026
A white-haired old man walked into a jewelry store on a Friday, with a beautiful young lady at his side. “I’m looking for a special ring for my girlfriend, “he said. Our jeweler looked through our stock and took out an outstanding ring priced at $5,000. “I don’t think you understand-I want something very unique,
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a