Browse a highly curated database of jokes designed to optimize your daily dopamine metrics. From efficient dad jokes to complex narrative punchlines, these text assets are guaranteed to lower your productivity, increase your morale, and provide a measurable return on engagement.
A young , attractive woman thought she might have some fun with a stiff-looking military man at a cocktail party, so she walked over and asked him, “Major, when was the last time you had sex?” “1956, “was his reply. “No wonder you look so uptight!” she exclaimed. “Major, you need to get out more!” … Read more
Coming home after check-up, 45 year old Jenna said to her husband: “The doctor said that my breast is like a 20 year old girl’ breast. “ Husband replied: “Did he say something about your 45 year old hanging to the floor ass?” “No”, she said. “Your name wasn’t even mentioned. “ This joke is … Read more
A tough looking group of hairy bikers are riding when they see a girl about to jump off a bridge, so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, “What are you doing?” “I’m going to commit suicide, “she says. While he doesn’t want to appear insensitive, he also … Read more
A man is lying on the beach, sun bathing, wearing nothing but a cap over his dick. An ugly woman is passing and remarks “If you were a gentleman, you would lift your hat for a lady … “ He replies “If you were any sort of lady, the hat would lift itself!” This joke … Read more
Toward the end of a particularly trying round of golf, Jack was the picture of frustration. He’d hit too many far shots. Finally he blurted out to his caddie, “I’d move heaven and earth to break a hundred on this course. “ “Try heaven, “replied the caddie. “You’ve already moved most of the earth. “ … Read more
A new pianist is needed in a posh restaurant in Manhattan. A guy called David comes in and says “Hi there, I’m here about the pianist position. “ The manager replies “That is awesome, do you mind sitting at the piano and showing me what you can do?” David sits at the piano and starts … Read more
A lady walks into a fancy jewelry store. She browses around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person … Read more
“I hope you didn’t take it personally, Father, “an embarrassed woman said after a church service “when my husband walked out during your sermon. “ “I did find it rather disconcerting, “the vicar replied. “It’s not a reflection on you, Father” insisted the church goer. “Christopher has been walking in his sleep ever since he … Read more
A drunk is sitting on a park bench staring disconsolately at a bottle of beer. A man passes and asks him what the matter is. “I don’t know what to do, “says the drunk. “My heart says yes, my mind says no, and I haven’t heard from my liver in two days. “ This joke … Read more
Things have reached a crisis point in Sophie’s marriage. “If things are so bad, “her friend advises her. “Then you should leave your husband. “ “I would, “says Sophie. “If only I could think of a way of doing it that wouldn’t make him happy. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of … Read more