Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
Browse Categories
View All Categories-
(181)
-
(1)
-
(69)
-
(356)
-
(748)
-
(1)
-
(95)
-
(836)
-
(1)
-
(15)
Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Sexual Contact
April 5, 2026
At a conference on the supernatural, one of the speakers asked, “Who here has ever seen a ghost?” Most of the hands go up. “And how many of you have had some form of interaction with a ghost?” About half the hands stay up. “Okay, now how many of you have had *physical* contact with
You’ve Given
April 5, 2026
Peter went to the pet shop and asked for 12 bees The clerk counted out 13 bees and handed them over. “You’ve given me one too many, “Peter said. “That one is a freebie” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
American Dog
April 5, 2026
A man is out walking in New York when he sees a girl being savaged by a fierce dog. He fights off the dog by beating about the head with a stick and saves the girl’s life. The girl’s mother rushes over to him: “Thank you, thank you, you are a hero, tomorrow all the
Parrot Steps
April 5, 2026
A guy gets a parrot but it’s got a bad attitude and foul vocabulary. He tries everything to change the bird’s attitude and clean up its talk but nothing works. Finally, in a moment of desperation, he puts the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he hears the bird squawking, kicking and screaming
Stupid Dog
April 5, 2026
A guy walks into a bar with his dog. He takes a seat and says, “I can bet 50 bucks to each of you that my dog can talk!” Everybody around agrees to the bet. The guy says, “Charlie, speak!” The dog is silent. “Charlie, speak, “the guy repeats. The noble dog still doesn’t react.
Bar Ouch
April 5, 2026
A man walks into a bar. “Ouch. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a