Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Mckinney Suit Settled

Mckinney Suit Settled

April 5, 2026

A young attorney who had taken over his father’s practice rushed home elated one night. “Dad, listen, “he shouted, “I’ve finally settled that old McKinney suit. “ “Settled it!” cried his astonished father. “Why, you idiot! We have been living off of that money for five years!” This joke is included in the Black Book

Bus Careened Down

Bus Careened Down

April 5, 2026

An old man on a crowded bus has trouble finding a seat. The bus careened down the avenue, shaking the passengers from left to right, and the old man, unable to support himself properly with his cane, fell to the floor. Little Johnny, sitting nearby, looked down at him and said, “If you put a

Square Foot Mansion

Square Foot Mansion

April 5, 2026

3 dads bragging about their children’s success gets a surprise when a 4th dad tells them this! Four friends, who hadn’t seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the restroom. Those who remained talked about their kids. The first guy said, “My

Renowned Surgeon Perform

Renowned Surgeon Perform

April 5, 2026

An elderly Jewish man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to receive the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. “Yes Dad, what is it?” “Don’t be nervous, son, do your best and just remember, if it

Study Enough Love

Study Enough Love

April 5, 2026

After Graduating from High School, David moves away from home to study at University. One of his letters home reads: Dear Father, University i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply ¢an’t think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can

Babysitter Keeps

Babysitter Keeps

April 5, 2026

“Mommy, what were you doing bouncing on Daddy’s stomach last night?” “I have to do that, or Daddy’s belly gets very fat. Bouncing keeps him skinny. “ “That’s not going to work. “ “Why not?” “Because the babysitter keeps blowing him back up again. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

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