Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Elephant Tim

Elephant Tim

April 5, 2026

Tim: I wish I had the money to buy an elephant. Tom: What do you want with an elephant? Tim: Nothing, I just want the money. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Electric Guitar

Electric Guitar

April 5, 2026

Juan told his wife he wanted a guitar to play while sitting in the Jacuzzi. The next day she bought him an electric guitar. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

These Prices

These Prices

April 5, 2026

Two people walk into a gas station. The first one says, “These prices are awful. They just keep going higher!” The second replies, “It doesn’t affect me at all. I always put in just $20 worth. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Wine Talking Sipping

Wine Talking Sipping

April 5, 2026

A couple is sitting on the porch sipping wine. The wife says, “I love you. “ The husband says, “Is that you or the wine talking?” The wife replies, “It’s me, talking to the wine. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Prize Possession Even

Prize Possession Even

April 5, 2026

A husband, owner of a new car, was somewhat reluctant to allow his wife to drive his prize possession even to the Supermarket which was a few blocks from the house. After she insisted, he finally relented, cautioning her as she departed, “Remember, if you have an accident, the newspaper will print your age!” This

Need Customer

Need Customer

April 5, 2026

Customer: “Excuse me, but are you looking to hire any help at present?” Manager: “No, we already have all the staff we need. “ Customer: “In that case, would you mind getting someone to wait on me?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Giorgio Rushes

Giorgio Rushes

April 5, 2026

Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something

Bites Yes

Bites Yes

April 5, 2026

“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of

Trained Parrot

Trained Parrot

April 5, 2026

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a

Next