Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Stay Fought Mistake
April 5, 2026
A husband and wife had a fight. Wife called her mom: “He fought with me again, I am coming to stay with you. “ Mom: “No dear, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to stay with you!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from
Stuck Consciousness Grim
April 5, 2026
A woman’s husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months. Things looked grim, but she was by his bedside every single day. One day as he slipped back into consciousness, he motioned for her to come close to him. She pulled the chair close to the bed and leaned her
Medical Reasons 2
April 5, 2026
Girl: “I can’t be your valentine for medical reasons. “ Boy: “Really?” Girl: “Yeah, you make me sick!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Geezer Exclaimed
April 5, 2026
A 90 year old geezer married a very young filly and was telling his doctor that they were expecting a baby. “Let me tell you a story, “the doctor said. “There was an absent-minded fellow who went hunting one day, but instead of picking up a gun, he picked up an umbrella. Suddenly, while he
Swanky Halloween Party
April 5, 2026
A couple was invited to a swanky Halloween party. The day of the party the wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was
Toilet Please Advise
April 5, 2026
A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband a text, “If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you!” The
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a