Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Long Yet
April 5, 2026
A boy, frustrated with all the rules he had to follow, asked his father, “Dad, how soon will I be old enough to do whatever I want?” The father answered immediately, “I don’t know. Nobody has lived that long yet. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it
Exchange News Susan
April 5, 2026
Susan and Martha meet at the market and exchange news. Susan said: “My husband was named Man of the Year. “ Martha replied: “Well that shows you what kind of a year it’s been. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Law Each Item
April 5, 2026
Weary of constantly picking clothes up from the floor of her son’s room, a mother finally laid down the law. Each item of clothing she had to pick up would cost her son 25 cents. By the end of the week, he owed her $9. 50. She received the money promptly, along with a 50
Egg Man’s Face
April 5, 2026
A man went to buy his wife a new bra but had no idea what size she needed. Sales lady tried to help him. She asked, “Is your wife shaped like a grapefruit?” “No, not a grapefruit. “ “Is she shaped like an orange?” “Um no, not an orange. “ “Is she shaped like an
Biological Parents
April 5, 2026
Father: “Son, you were adopted. “ Son: “What?! I knew it! I want to meet my biological parents!” Father: “We are your biological parents. Now pack up, the new ones will pick you up in 20 minutes. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Once She’s Done
April 5, 2026
A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket, she sees four legs instead of just her husband’s two. Suspecting the worst, she reaches for an extra pillow and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can, letting her anger and frustration out. Once
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Giorgio Rushes
April 5, 2026
Giorgo and his beautiful girl-friend Isabella rush in to see the vicar: “We want to get married. Here are all our papers, and these two people are our witnesses. Can you do a quick service?” The vicar is amused. He marries the two young people, pockets his fee and asks: “Isn’t there a proverb, something
Bites Yes
April 5, 2026
“Don’t be afraid of the dog, “said the lady to Little Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. “You know the old proverb, ‘A barking dog never bites?’“ “Yes, “replied Little Johnny. “You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?” This joke is included in the Black Book of
Trained Parrot
April 5, 2026
There was a little old lady who was nearly blind. She had three sons and they wanted to prove which one was the best son to her. So the first son bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her. The second son bought her a