Jokes Ltd 
One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one. The man asks, “How much is the yellow one?” The assistant says, “$2000. “ The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it’s so expensive. … Read more
At a conference on the supernatural, one of the speakers asked, “Who here has ever seen a ghost?” Most of the hands go up. “And how many of you have had some form of interaction with a ghost?” About half the hands stay up. “Okay, now how many of you have had *physical* contact with … Read more
Peter went to the pet shop and asked for 12 bees The clerk counted out 13 bees and handed them over. “You’ve given me one too many, “Peter said. “That one is a freebie” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man is out walking in New York when he sees a girl being savaged by a fierce dog. He fights off the dog by beating about the head with a stick and saves the girl’s life. The girl’s mother rushes over to him: “Thank you, thank you, you are a hero, tomorrow all the … Read more
A guy gets a parrot but it’s got a bad attitude and foul vocabulary. He tries everything to change the bird’s attitude and clean up its talk but nothing works. Finally, in a moment of desperation, he puts the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he hears the bird squawking, kicking and screaming … Read more
A guy walks into a bar with his dog. He takes a seat and says, “I can bet 50 bucks to each of you that my dog can talk!” Everybody around agrees to the bet. The guy says, “Charlie, speak!” The dog is silent. “Charlie, speak, “the guy repeats. The noble dog still doesn’t react. … Read more
A man walks into a bar. “Ouch. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?” The mother answered, “God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made. . “ Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. . The father answered, “Many years ago there were monkeys from which … Read more
A dog walks into a pub, and takes a seat. “Bartender, a pint of lager and a packet of crisps please” The bartender, rubbing his eyes in disbelief, says “Did. . did you just talk?!” “Yes I have, why?” Said the dog “It’s just incredible! I’ve never seen a talking dog! You know, you should … Read more
A parrot was in a cage in a pet shop with a string attached to each leg. A man walked in looking to buy a pet, so the shopkeeper came over and started to try and sell him a dog when the man noticed the parrot. He asked what the strings were for and the … Read more