Jokes Ltd “That’s a nice plant, “said a woman at the florist’s shop, pointing to the flower I was buying. “Yeah, my wife and I had an argument, “I admitted. “I was going to buy her a dozen roses, but I don’t think she’s that mad at me. “ This joke is included in the Black Book … Read more
Two newlyweds quickly realized their marriage wasn’t working and filed for a divorce. The judge asked them what the problem was. The husband replied, “In the five weeks that we’ve been together, we haven’t been able to agree on a single thing. “ The judge turned to the wife, “Have you anything to say?” She … Read more
One morning the phone rang at 3:00 a. m. in Jeff’s house. He picked up the phone and a woman asked, “Is this 888-3237?” “No, this is 888-3247. “Jeff replied. “Oh, I’m so sorry for disturbing you, “the woman said. “That’s alright, “Jeff said. “I had to get up to answer the phone anyway. “ … Read more
A tourist stopped at a country gas station. While his car was being serviced, he noticed an old-timer basking in the sun with a piece of rope in his hand. The tourist walked up to the old-timer and asked, “What do you have there?” “That’s a weather gauge, sonny, “the old-timer replied. “How can you … Read more
Once upon a time, there lived a king who was only 15 inches tall. He was a terrible king, but he made a great ruler. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A woman visited a psychic of some local repute. In a dark and gloomy room, gazing at the Tarot cards laid out before her, the Tarot reader delivered the bad news: “There is no easy way to say this so I’ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a … Read more
Two friends are talking over lunch on an outdoor patio. “So what are you doing for summer vacation?” one asks. The other one replies, “I want to go to Italy again, like last year. “ The first asks, “Wow! You went to Italy last year?” The other answers, “No, but I wanted to. “ This … Read more
At 9 p. m. one night, a pilot who had run out of fuel made an emergency landing at a top secret government base. He was quickly surrounded by security and taken inside to be interrogated. The interrogation was grueling because they wanted to make sure it was an unplanned landing and he was not … Read more
Paul was describing a 25 pound sea bass he’d caught recently after fighting it for three hours. Bill interrupted the story saying, “I saw the picture you took of that fish. You’re lucky if it even weighed 12 pounds. “ Paul replied, “Well … a fish can lose an awful lot of weight during three … Read more
Success is relative… The more success, the more relatives! This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.