Jokes Ltd Two blondes, Jane and Sarah, were deep in a philosophical argument. “Since you’re so damned smart, “Sarah says, “Answer this question: why is it that when a slice of buttered bread falls to the ground, it’s bound to fall on the buttered side?” Jane snorts, “It doesn’t always land on the buttered side. Here, I’ll … Read more
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. “I have good news and bad news, “the owner replied. “The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told … Read more
At a wine merchant’s warehouse the regular taster died, and the director started looking for a new one to hire. A drunk with a ragged dirty look came to apply for the position. The director wondered how to send him away. They gave him a glass to drink. The old drunk tried it and said, … Read more
Dorothy and Edna, two “senior” widows, are talking. Dorothy: “That nice George Johnson asked me out for a date. ? I know you went out with him last week, and I wanted to talk with you about him before I give him my answer. “ Edna: “Well, I’ll tell you. He shows up at my … Read more
A woman said to her friend, “I don’t know what to do. My husband is such a mess maker that you can’t imagine. He doesn’t put anything in its place, I am always going around the house picking up after him. “ The friend says, “Take a tip from me. The first week after we … Read more
During his physical, the doctor asked the patient about his daily activity level. He described a typical day this way: ‘Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake, marched up and down several rocky hills, … Read more
Three friends, a Rabbi, a Hindu holy man and a lawyer, had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer. The farmer said, “There might be a problem; you see, I only have room for two to sleep, so one of you must sleep in the barn. “ “No … Read more
An elderly man went t o his doctor and said: “Doc, I think I’m getting senile. Several times lately, I have forgotten to zip up. “ “That’s not senility, “replied the doctor. “Senility is when you forget to zip down. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it … Read more
Two blonde sisters had promised their Uncle who had been a seafaring gentleman all his life, to bury him at sea when he died. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the two blondes kept their promise. They set off from the pier with their uncle all stitched up in a burial … Read more
A group of butts is walking. The smallest struggles to keep up. “Sorry, I’m a little behind. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.