Jokes Ltd A young, freshly minted lieutenant was sent to a foreign country as part of the peacekeeping mission. During a briefing on landmines, the captain asked questions. Our intrepid soldier raised his hand and asked, “If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?” “Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 … Read more
After 5 hours sitting in the bar, a man was in no shape to drive, wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. “What are you doing out here at 2 am?”, said the officer. “I’m going to a lecture, “the man said. … Read more
A pianist was hired to play background music for a movie. When it was completed he asked when and where he could see the picture. The producer sheepishly confessed that it was actually a porn film and it was due out in a month. A month later, the musician went to a porn theater to … Read more
The patient shook his doctor’s hand in gratitude and said, “Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will. “ “That is very kind of you, “said the doctor emotionally, and … Read more
A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who was a big burly man, tossed his pants to his bride and said, “here put these on. “ She put them on, and the waist was twice the size of her body. “I … Read more
A lawyer finds out he has a brain tumor, and it’s inoperable – in fact, it’s so large, they have to do a brain transplant. His doctor gives him a choice of available brains – there’s a jar of rocket scientist brains for $10 an ounce, a jar of regular scientist brains for $15 an … Read more
Office executive “Sir, can I have a day off next week to visit my mother-in-law?” Boss “Certainly not!” Office executive “Thank you so much sir! I knew you would be understanding. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
The following conversation took place between a husband and wife: Wife: “How many women have you slept with?” Husband: “Only you darling, I was awake with the others. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Two law partners hire a new cute, young secretary and a contest arises between them as to who can bed her first, even though they’re both already married. Eventually one of them scores with her and his partner is quite eager to hear how things went. “So what did you think?” he asks. “Ahh, “replies … Read more
A man came storming out of the courthouse ranting and raving; obviously really angry. He stomped across the street and into the bar and flounced down on a stool muttering, “Asshole attorneys”. The man next to him recoiled in outrage saying “I want you to know I highly resent that remark”. “Why, are you an … Read more